Pumpkin Pornography

Yesterday, I showed up at my mom’s door with four pumpkins, two bottles of red wine and a bag of tiny chocolate bars. Holy shit did we have fun! I cannot say the same for my little brother but, whatever, teenagers can be such prudes.

Here are pictures from my mother’s and my foray into pumpkin pornography. I think we did pretty well for first timers.

Ride 'em Cowboy

Money Shot

 

Rear View

We cajoled, begged and bribed my brother into carving a pumpkin of his very own. Here is what he came up with:

WTF?

I realize this was yet another form of protest against my mother’s and my antics but I still think his pumpkin carving was quite clever. For some reason, he seemed displeased that we were so pleased. Teenagers? Who can figure them out.

Now, while I am on the topic (sort of) of visiting my mother’s house, do you all remember my telling of the awkwardness at a sexy party? The one where my mother told me she would put “that pretty dildo that looks like a dolphin” on display in her bathroom? Well, at some point in the evening, I wandered into her washroom and guess what was on her shelf? Yep, you got it.

Glass Dolphin Dildo

It really does look like a dolphin, doesn’t it?

Anyway, I am off to get ready for Halloween festivities, folks. Have a spook-tacular Saturday!